It’s a scenario that we see often: A family matriarch or patriarch bought a vacation property years ago. Over time, the property has significantly appreciated in value. Now, as they look ahead, the current owners want to pass that property on to their children.
This is where things can get complicated. The children often find themselves in very different financial circumstances. Some may be able to afford the upkeep and ownership responsibilities while others may prefer to turn their share into cash. These differences can create tension unless they’re approached with care.
RTD suggests starting with a conversation. Not a negotiation or a solution, rather a space where each family member can speak about what the property means to them and what they hope for moving forward. Is it a place of personal history and family memories? A source of future rental income? A burden? A gift?
It’s important not to rush to decisions. The goal at the outset is understanding, not resolution. That means resisting the urge to “solutionize” too early. Instead, ask:
- What does this property represent to each person?
- What outcome would feel fair or meaningful?
- Is this about legacy? Financial need? Connection?
Also recognize that more often than not, this property is a part of a living family system and more than just a title deed. Each person’s relationship with the home is shaped by different experiences, emotions, and expectations.
Finally, ask the hard but necessary questions:
- Have the parents ever voiced their hopes for the property?
- Have the children?
- Why now? Is there a health issue or financial challenge prompting the discussion?
This isn’t about real estate. It’s about people, history, and what comes next.
RTD has significant experience at navigating these conversations. We recommend considering a facilitator that can help families get unstuck and prioritize the key elements of each family members interests. With that information, a skilled facilitator can help move the family forward and craft a plan that addresses all of the family’s needs as best as possible .
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